As the year changes, like many other years Lord I find myself reflecting on all that You have accomplished in and through me. I also can’t help but think on what You haven’t been able to accomplish due to unfaithfulness, fear, disobedience, bitterness and unforgiveness. I am grateful Lord for the many levels I have climbed in you. I find that I am even grateful for correction and guidance and being told no.
As a result I have better knowledge of you. I understand more what you have been doing on my behalf and that every answer You give me is for good. You have been perfecting me. My overall goal for the next year Lord is to continue to be perfected. I want to allow You to create that good and perfect work in me, because I know You better. I have better knowledge of who You are and who I am in You. I can better see what You have for me and who You have called me to be. I have knowledge in you Lord that should allow this perfecting to occur. This is my desire.
In Genesis chapter 3 when Adam and Eve sinned, the Bible says they ate from the tree of knowledge of good and evil. That word knowledge is translated from a word that means experience among other things. Adam and Eve had now experienced good and evil. That is how they had knowledge of it. They knew nakedness by experiencing it, after all, they had always been naked. Tasting the fruit allowed them to taste (feel what it feels like) to be naked. If I am understanding this Lord, I have the Holy Ghost living in me, and this has allowed over these years of having the knowledge or experience of growth and You moving in and through me.
I should be able to leave the unfaithfulness, fear, disobedience, bitterness and unforgiveness behind. I know what that feels like and what the consequences of sin feels like. It has only led to more heartache and loneliness as I separate myself from You and Your will. In comparison, I also know the joy, peace, love, and contentment with following You alone. I know the difference in needing to be accepted by people and wanting to pleasing to You. I know the exhilarating feeling of boldness to turn my back on sin and generational demons that try to take me out. I know the freedom in putting on humility and confess my wrong, even when I don’t feel like I have to. I know the quiet, content, peacefulness of living single, saved and satisfied, even when the world tells me that is not enough. I know lifting feeling from laying my heaviness down from carrying the weight of trying to run an agency devoted to showing your love and compassion on its clients and employees. I am grateful for all You have allowed me to experience and know. I give myself deeper to You Lord: perfect, complete thoroughly, repair, adjust, fit, frame, mend, join together, prepare, and restore me. I am YOURS!!!